Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Memories

In my on-going quest for non-overstuffed closets and cabinets, I am participating in the city-wide garage sale this weekend.  Toward that end, I drug some boxes out of the basement storage room - boxes that haven't been opened since we moved to this house six years ago.  One box was some bric-a-brac of my Grandma's.  With some encouragement from my wise mother, I was able to choose a few meaningful items to keep and let go of the rest. 

The second box was mementos from my children's preschool and grade school days.  After an hour of tears as I reread "You're the best mom ever!" and "My mom is as pretty as a princess," they all went back into the box, to be brought out another day when I need a good cry. 

Also in that box were two thin, paperback books - "A Gift of Memories from Grandma/Grandpa".  I gave these books to my maternal grandparents when I was newly married and asked them to complete them.  Grandpa's Parkinson's Disease was advanced enough at that point that writing was difficult, so most of his answers are one or two words, but there are some wonderful insights and a few humorous stories. 
"Grandpa, if you were elected President, what would you do for our country?"   "I would outlaw green peppers in salads."
Grandma told a story of hiding in a patch of tall grass as a child, and listening to the whole family searching for her.  She also admitted to some cooking fiascoes in her newlywed days.  

I wish I had taken the time to visit with them about their answers - to ask more questions and get more details - but when you're twenty-two, you think there will always be time. Even as incomplete as they are, the books are precious.  They were repacked with the other items for another round of memories another day.

Not long after my day of memories, I was browsing Barnes and Noble and picked up "Mom, Tell Me Your Story" a guided journal by Susan Branch. This memory book is much more in-depth, with spaces for full-page answers, rather than a word or two. 

Some are straight forward questions:

Where did your family go on vacation?
Who were your childhood friends?
What did you have then that we don't use any more?

And some are going to take more thought:

What did you dream about while growing up?
As you matured, what kinds of things inspired you?
What is your best advice about relationships?
What should I know about having children?
What would you most like to be remembered for?

Writing my own story is a challenge that is both exciting and frightening.  I'm not shooting for a professional memoir, but I do want to write more than cursory facts.  I want to give my children some genuine insight into being a child in the 60's and 70's, a young wife in the 80's, a stay-at-home mom in the 90's -  a true picture of their mom, flaws and all. But also some some stories that they'll enjoy finding and re-finding.  My plan is to work on it bit by bit.  Maybe I'll present it to my kids when I'm 60 - or maybe 70 - or 80.  After all, there's always plenty of time, right? 

5 comments:

  1. Great idea! I think often how many things I want to tell my kids. Maybe I need a journal like that!

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    1. They are on sale at Barnes and Noble - in store or on line.

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  2. What a lovely gift for your children. I would sure love to know more about my grandparents or my parents as kids or young adults.

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  3. I love this idea. I have looked up some of these style of books and now want to order them for my childrens' grandparents to fill in for them. Thanks so much for posting about your memories.

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  4. I'm with you on wishing you'd spent more time talking to your grandparents about their lives. Times were so different then and I wish I had known more about them as people, rather than just my grandparents. Like, why didn't my grandma get married until she was well into her 30's? And how did she feel when her first baby was stillborn? I love your idea of getting your life into words now for your kids because they will one day be in the same boat we are in, they just don't know to ask the questions yet.

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