Explosive Eighteen by Janet Evanovich

Have you ever been on one of those carnival rides that swings you back and forth, gaining speed, climbing higher with each swing, until momentum fails and you sail back down and up the other side?  Eventually there is a moment where you swing high enough that the cage pauses for just a second at the top of the arc before tipping over the top, bringing you down the other side in a new direction.  

That is how I felt reading Janet Evanovich's newest Stephanie Plum novel.  There were moments when the momentum built in one direction, nearly to the tipping point . . . but not quite.  Then the story swings in the other direction, gaining speed again as we reach the point of no return . . . and fall backwards once again.  It was fun, but it lacked that climactic moment of decision and new direction.  In the end the ride slows and everything returns to it's usual spot. . . and we wait, somewhat less enthusiastically, for the next ride.

Thanksgiving Vacation: Hallelujah! Holy Sh*t! Where's the Tylenol?

The title of this post is a quote from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (click on the link to watch the YouTube clip) and it perfectly describes our Thanksgiving celebration.

It started so innocently.  We just wanted to see our kids and grandkids, to have them all in the one spot at one time.  Never mind that we now live in a two-bedroom, one-bath house with half the square footage of our former home - Green Acres has lots of space for boys to run and build forts and search for treasure. Family is all about togetherness, right? With some well-choreographed bathroom time, we could do this.

Amy and the boys flew in to Kansas City on Wednesday evening.  Having those two boys (ages 7 and 5) run off the plane and straight into our arms was the beginning of the "Hallelujah!" portion of our gathering.  Amy even mimicked their actions by running and jumping on Dave.  It got us a few strange looks from fellow travelers, but it was the first of many good laughs.  Mitch had arrived at our house by the time we returned from the airport bearing pizza, and Amanda and her boyfriend showed up a few hours later.  We stayed up late playing Trivial Pursuit, eating and giggling.  But, eventually, (sometime around 1:00 a.m.) we had to go to bed and we got the first hint that their might be a "Holy Sh*t" tinge to this weekend.

The girls shared the guest room, and the four guys (big and little) got air mattresses and the couch in the living room.  We were now hours past the little ones' bedtime and in a new and exciting environment with no individual bedrooms where they could relax and drift off to sleep.  Combine that with tired adults who's patience was waning and we were already questioning this plan.  Eventually we all got to sleep and began Thanksgiving day bright and cheerful.  Air mattresses and bedding were piled into our bedroom, clearing the living room for day-time use.  We shuffled in and out of the bathroom in ten-minute slots, leaving a trail of beauty and hygiene products until the counter looked like an aisle at Wal-Greens.  

Unfortunately, the plan for outside activities failed when the weather didn't cooperate - turning chilly, windy and drizzly and keeping everyone inside for most of Thursday, Friday and Saturday.  We did jigsaw puzzles at the kitchen table, then moved on to board games.  We prepared more food, snacked on leftovers and pie, watched movies - we even put up the Christmas tree on Friday evening and had our gift exchange with Amy/boys since we won't be seeing them next month.  

All of these activities were fun, but six adults stuck indoors with two rambunctious boys, two dogs and too-little space causes frayed nerves.  Temper's flared a couple times, but never broke into full flame, thankfully.  Amanda and Layton tried to escape by hitting the Black Friday sales, but had a blow-out, and the cost of replacing the tire and rim put a crimp in their Christmas shopping.  By Saturday morning we were fully convinced that we had lost our minds for trying this, but we could hang on for a few more hours until Amy's plane departed and the others returned to college.  But it wasn't to be...

Like something out of a Stephen King novel, just when we thought we were going to survive this adventure, we heard it....the growling, gravelly sound coming from the basement.  We listened in horror for a few minutes until I broke through the paralysis of fear and said "Dave, the pump on the well is making a strange noise."  Sure enough, the pump on our water well was grinding to a slow death.  Which meant, among other things, the men's room was now located in the shelter-belt behind the house.  Mitch had already headed back to school so, while Dave drove to town for a new pump and various replacement parts, Layton, the boyfriend I'm afraid we'll never see again after this experience, hauled buckets of water from the hydrant by the garden (on a different well) so the women still had indoor facilities.  Bless his heart!

Forty-eight hours later, the house is empty and back to it's usual only-slightly-rumpled state, the new pump is finally humming softly and water miraculously appears when we turn a knob. Two days of hand-hauling water ("How many times a day do you have to pee?") and "bathing" in a sink of tepid water brings a whole new level of closeness to a marriage, but we survived and are still smiling.  At least we were until I went to get something from the freezer for last night's supper.  I moved a box of ice cream to reach behind it, and it sloshed.  Not a good sign.  I began poking other supposed-to-be-solid packages to find them slightly mushy.  Turns out the outlet behind the freezer is on the same breaker as the well pump.  Who knew?  Not us, obviously, or the guy who labeled the breakers.  Although the freezer was running at that time, it had been off for two days while the pump was being replaced.

The thawing food has been disposed of, the pump is still humming, everyone made it home safely, most of the leftovers are gone and we can look back on the weekend with fond memories and determination to never try that again.  Next time, we're meeting at a resort!  Hallelujah - Holy Sh*t - Where's the tylenol?

Thanksgiving Puzzle: Answers

Top row (L to R):  Rosanne, Charlie Brown Thanksgiving, Bewitched, Brady Bunch, West Wing, The Waltons

Row 2:  Cheers, WKRP in Cincinnati, Alton Brown - Good Eats, Everybody Loves Raymond, Full House, Family Guy

Row 3:  Mad About You, Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, Happy Days, Friends, The Cosby Show

Row 4:  General Hospital (The Quartermain family), 7th Heaven, Beverly Hillbillies/Petticoat Junction/Green Acres*, That 70's Show, Rachael Ray - Thirty Minute Meals

*This was a bit of a trick question.  This picture is from the November 27, 1968 episode of Beverly Hillbillies, in which the Clampetts go to Hooterville to spend thanksgiving with the folks of Petticoat Junction and Green Acres - so if you guessed any of those three shows, give yourself a point.  If you recognized all three, give yourself a bonus point.

In Everything Give Thanks...

Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good; His love endures forever. - Psalm 107:1

We wish you a wonderful Thanksgiving full of all the things you are most grateful for, and hope that the words of the Psalmist touch your heart and you know His enduring love.

A Puzzling Thanksgiving Post

This week's puzzle is, of course, about Thanksgiving.  Below are twenty-two TV families or personalities celebrating the holiday.  How many can you recognize. (Hint: One picture contains characters from more than one show.)

Click to Enlarge

Thanksgiving Preparations

Three kids, two grandkids, two in-laws, one boyfriend, one angry ex-husband, one Alzheimers patient and a partridge in a pear tree.  It's shaping up to be our normal dysfunctional family gathering for Thanksgiving . . . and I can't wait.

Amy and her boys arrive in Kansas City tomorrow evening.  By the time we get back home, the other kids - including the boyfriend - should be waiting.  The in-laws arrive Thursday morning.  That's ten people for Thanksgiving dinner, and eight in the house through the weekend . . . a two bedroom house.  People will be sleeping on the couch, the floor, air mattresses - any place they can find a spot.

Tonight and tomorrow are dedicated to food prep and a light house cleaning.  I see no point to deep cleaning - no one will be able to see the dirt between all the bodies and luggage.  

I will be a little scarce on-line through the rest of the week.  There's a Thanksgiving puzzle and (hopefully) a book review set to post automatically, but I probably won't be visiting you all and commenting until next week.  Hope you have a wonderful holiday and much to be thankful for!

Christmas and Cynicism

Sometimes I don't understand myself.  On the one hand, I am a total Christmas freak.  Just standing in the holiday section at Wal-Mart makes me happy.  I've nearly worn out my new Michael Buble' Christmas CD, and it's still November.  My DVR records anything containing the words Christmas or holiday without even asking me.  

On the other hand, I'm a cynic.  I punch holes in every conspiracy theory.  I don't believe good always wins over evil (at least in this life).  Dreams don't come true.  The glass isn't half full or half empty - it's just all you get.

Given these conflicting traits, I suppose it's hardly surprising that I pre-order the latest Christmas, feel-good, pretty cover, sentimental story and then whine because it's sappy.  I don't know . . . I'm an enigma.*  But here are my thoughts on The Christmas Note by Donna VanLiere.

It has everything a Christmas novel should have - family, forgiveness, and a happy ending.  But problems aren't solved that quickly except in thirty-minute sit-coms.  It gives you a warm feeling of Christmas cheer and hope.  But the real world doesn't work that easily. 

 Well . . . regardless of which side you're on in the Christmas feel-good/clap-trap debate, take that information and proceed accordingly.

Gretchen Daniels has recently moved into an apartment with her two children to be closer to her mother.  Next-door neighbor Melissa McCreary prefers to keep to herself.  One day, a local landlord who is looking for Melissa knocks on Gretchen’s door for assistance.  Melissa’s mother has died and the landlord needs Melissa to empty her mother’s apartment.  Gretchen reaches out and offers to help, but the apartment is a gut wrenching shamble of a home.  There is little worth saving except for a few photos and an unfinished note discovered on the crate beside the bed. In the two scribbled lines, Melissa discovers she has a brother and a sister that she never knew about.  Can two very different women embark on a journey that explores a long-buried need for forgiveness, hope, and redemption?

*West Wing quote alert

Six Word Saturday

Bureaucratic agencies out to get me!

Between hateful insurance companies and government office screw-ups, bureaucracy did it's best to ruin my week.  Tired of tilting at windmills, so I'm spending my Saturday Christmas shopping with my daughter.  That's a wonderful reward at the end of the red-tape rainbow.

Six Word Saturday is sponsored by Cate at ShowMyFace.  Want to play along?  Just describe your life (or something in it) in a phrase using exactly six words.  For more information click here.  You can add an explanation, a video, a song or nothing at all.  Visit Cate's blog to link your entry or to read all entries.

Virtual Advent Tour 2011

Kailana from The Written World and Marg from Adventures of An Intrepid Reader will be hosting the Virtual Advent Tour again.  Participants take turn sharing something about their Christmas celebration - family traditions, recipes, movies, music, decorations or ethnic customs.  If you would like to join in, visit Virtual Advent Tour and sign up.  You will be assigned a day to post your Advent thoughts on your blog.  Then just follow along with the Advent calendar and open a few blog-treats each day in December.

This will be our third year as part of the tour.  It's a great way to meet new people, learn about Christmas celebrations from different cultures, and get some new ideas for your own holiday season.

11/12 Puzzling Post - Answers

Did you recognize all ten celebrities born on November 12th?

Top Row (L-R):  Tonya Harding, Nadia Comaneci, David Schwimmer, Ryan Gosling
Row 2:  Charles Manson, Neil Young, Anne Hathaway
Row 3:  Al Michaels, Sammy Sosa, Megan Mullally

Virtual Book Tour and Give-Away: Katie's Way by Marta Perry

Hoping for a distraction after a personal heartbreak, new arrival Katie sets up shop on Pleasant Valley's Main Street, where Amish and Englisch intermingle.  It's not long before a quilting circle forms and women from both worlds are crafting together and sharing their secrets, turning the store into a lively spot for socializing . . . much to the consternation of the furniture craftsman next door.  Caleb Brand has kept to himself since he lost his betrothed under scandelous circumstances, and he could do without all the feminine chatter - and Katie Miller's carefree attitude.

When Katie becomes involved with her Englisch friends in promoting Pennsylvania Dutch Days, some in town appreciate the new business it brings.  But others are upset about the flood of outsiders it attracts.  Katie turns to Caleb for comfort, and despite his resistance, a fragile friendship forms.  Then, when acts of vandalism suddenly threaten Katie's shop, Caleb must decide whtether to stand by the young woman who has brough a spring thaw to his frozen heart, and Katie must question whether her cherished independence may deprive her of one more chance at love.

During my time purchasing books for the library, I bought a lot of Amish romances.  I knew that they were becoming more and more popular with romance and Christian fiction readers.  But I had never tried one myself, so I was curious when presented the opportunity to review Katie's Way, the fifth volume in the Pleasant Valley series by Marta Perry.

What I found was a new kind of heroine.  Katie is an independent business-woman, determined to build tourist traffic to her quilt shop and provide a stable home for her younger sister.  That in itself is not unusual, but when you add in the Amish lifestyle and traditions, it creates an interesting contrast.  And an interesting variation on the typical romance.

Katie's Way is, admittedly, a standard romance format - boy  meets girl, they circle, they are pulled together, they resist, until some outside event forces them together and they all live happily ever after.  And any romance-lover will tell you that no matter how many times you read that basic story, it will still hold your attention if done well.  Ms. Perry definitely does it well.  The characters were people I wanted to get to know.  The variety of ages - from teenager to widow - broadened the story, and the unanswered questions in Caleb's past and the vandalism episodes put an edge of mystery on the plot that kept me reading and rooting for Caleb and Katie. 

Thank you to Marta Perry for providing me a copy of Katie's Way and Tracee @ Review From Here for organizing this blog tour.

Give Away:  I am passing along my copy of Katie's Way.  Just leave a comment to be entered in the drawing.  A winner will be selected by random number drawing on Monday, Nov. 21st.

A Puzzling Post: 11/12 Quiz

In honor of Mitch's 21st birthday, this week's Puzzling Post focuses on people born on November 12th.  Can you name these ten famous (or infamous) people who share Mitch's birthday?

Click to Enlarge

Happy Birthday, Bud!

Saturday marked the twenty-first birthday of our son, Mitch.  For most of those years, we have called him Bud - which started when he was about this size (photo on left) and was christened Dad's Little Buddy.  If you'll allow me a few minutes to wander down Memory Lane, I'll try not to get too sappy.

Mitch has always been a fan of science and mechanics.  Anything that he could tear apart, rebuild, or modify - he did. Including my sewing machine, which still isn't quite assembled correctly.  At around age 8, he began building model rockets with Dave - a hobby they continue and just one of the things Dave and Mitch have shared over the years.  In fact, most of Mitch's early years were spent trying to be "just like dad" - sports, hunting/fishing, woodworking, and anything mechanical.  Mitch had a miniature workbench next to Dave's in the garage where he "worked on" an old electric moter with his own set of tools.  Dave had incredible patience for teaching - making home repair chores take twice as long as necessary so that Mitch could learn from doing.  

There were also many, many hours of working with Dad at the grain elevator.  This picture (below) of the two of them is one of my all-time favorites.  We have lots of fond - and funny - memories of Mitch learning to shift gears long before he could reach the clutch, dumping trucks, riding the "man lift" . . .

Dave and Mitch (Age 16) get the
 Richard Petty Expreience

Hard to believe it's been 21 years.  During his senior year of high school, Mitch discovered the medical field - totally not what we expected, but we shouldn't have been surprised, given his love of science and his compassion.  He is now a Junior at Fort Hays State University, majoring in nursing, working for the Kansas Lions Eye Bank and driving a cement truck part-time.  What a renaissance man!

We went to Hays for the weekend to celebrate with him.  I would say something here about how amazing it is to get a bear-hug from this 6'3" 200+ lb. man when it seems like I was holding him in my arms yesterday - but that would be over the sappy line.  So I'll just say...

Happy Birthday, Bud!  We love you and we're proud of you!              

Movie Quote Answers

Sorry it took me so long to get these posted - I simply forgot.  Now that my head's back in the game, here are the answers:

1. Who would have thought a good little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness?  The Wizard of Oz
2. There's the whole world at your feet.  And who gets to see it but the birds, the stars and the chimney sweeps?  Mary Poppins
3. Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining.  The Outlaw Josie Wales
4. Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.  Animal House
5. Maybe Christmas, perhaps...means a little bit more!  How The Grinch Stole Christmas
6. Negative, Ghost Rider, the pattern is full.  Top Gun
7. Anywhere you go, let me go too.  Christine, that's all I ask of you.  The Phantom of the Opera
8. This is not a piece of land.  This is my home and I'm gonna be a father again and I don't want to bring my baby home to a condo on the beach!  I wanna drive down that street and I wanna pull into this driveway.  Father of the Bride II
9. Stop her!  That's the girl whose voice you heard and loved tonight.  She's the real star of the picture.  Singin' in the Rain
10. He cannot stand still when the trumpet sounds.  Secretariat
11. That wasn't flying.  That was falling...with style.  Toy Story
12. Where does he get those wonderful toys?  Batman
13. Well, I hate to disagree with you, but not only IS there such a person, but here I am to prove it.  Miracle on 34th Street
14. Can I drive? - No - Then would you?  Twister
15. This is my house, I have to defend it.  Home Alone
16. Don't you worry.  If they could get a washing machine to fly, my Jimmy could land it.  Apollo 13
17. Be sure to drink your Ovaltine.  Ovaltine?  A crummy commercial?  Son of a b*tch!  A Christmas Story
18. Is this a holdup? - It's a science experiment.  Back to the Future III
19. You've been given a great gift, George: A chance to see what the world would be like without you.  It's a Wonderful Life
20. Snakes, Why'd it have to be snakes?  Raiders of the Lost Ark
21. A boy's best friend is his mother.  Psycho
22. You're skipping Christmas?  Isn't that against the law?  Christmas with the Kranks
23. Ditto!  Ghost
24. Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things you can't see.  Polar Express
25. Peel out.  I just love it when guys peel out.  American Graffiti
26. You're a disgrace to the outfit.  You're soft!  You're sloppy!  You're unruly!  You're undisciplined!  And I never saw anything look so wonderful in my whole life.  White Christmas
27. Why would a man leave his apartment three times on a rainy night with a suitcase and come back three times?  Rear Window
28. Keep Christmas in your own way, and let me keep it in mine.  A Christmas Carol
29. He wasn't even there.  That was important information, don't you think?  A Few Good Men
30. Ted Nugent called.  He wants his shirt back.  Ocean's Eleven
31. Jeez, what was that for? - It doesn't matter.  It's in the past.  Lion King
32. The justice system works swiftly in the future, now that we've abolished all lawyers.  Back to the Future II

How many did you get correct?

Shakespeare's Christmas by Charlaine Harris

Even in a sleepy Arkansas town, the holidays can be murder. Lily Bard is going home for the holidays. More comfortable in baggy sweats than bridesmaid's frills, Lily isn't thrilled about attending her estranged sister's wedding. She has moved to Shakespeare, Arkansas, to start a new life, cleaning houses for a living, trying to forget the violence that once nearly destroyed her. Now she's heading back to home and hearth--just in time for murder.

The town's doctor and nurse have been bludgeoned to death at the office. And Lily's detective boyfriend suddenly shows up at her parents' door. Jack Leeds is investigating an eight-year-old kidnapping and the trail leads straight to Lily's hometown. It just might have something to do with the murders...and her sister's widowed fiancé. With only three days before the wedding, Lily must work fast to clean up the messy case before her sister commits...marriage!


I've heard so many wonderful things about the writings of Charlaine Harris, but I just couldn't get into the Sookie Stackhouse series.  Vampires aren't my thing.  So, I was excited when I discovered that she has also penned a cozy mystery series featuring Lily Bard - set in Shakespeare, Arkansas.  (Ya gotta love a writer with a wry sense of humor.)  I started with #3 in the series, Shakespeare's Christmas, because that's the one I found in my recent browse through The Dusty Bookshelf in Manhattan - And I loved it.   Although there was some back-story that would have filled in some blanks, I didn't have any trouble following along without reading the first two books.

That back-story is just what will make Shakespeare's Christmas (and the rest of the series) appeal to Cozy fans - characters that you get to know slowly and familiar places to be re-visited.  However, it also appealed to the "thriller reader" side of me because it moved at a faster pace than the average cozy and left the reader to piece together clues on their own rather than relying on rambling sections of the heroine's thoughts as she does all the detective work.  Fast, fun holiday read that will have me looking for more Charlaine Harris books.

The Amazing ApplePear

Today's post is basically a commerical for my newest obsession - the ApplePear (or Asian Pear, if you prefer).  Whether you're reading this post aloud or in your head, please do so in your best Julia Child voice.  This is how all posts/discussion concerning food should take place.  And thank you for your support.*

The Apple Pear is a relatively new fruit to most people, although they have been grown here since the Gold Rush days, when Chinese miners planted them in the foot hills of the Sierra Nevadas. For the most part, Apple Pear varieties are round in shape with white flesh giving them the appearance and texture similar to an apple. They have a refreshing pear flavor. Apple pears:

• are low in calories
• are high in fiber
• are a great source of vitamin C
• don't turn brown after slicing like typical apples.
• ripen on the tree
• will store for a month in your refrigerator crisper
• are Yum-O

(all information, except that Yum-0 part - that was all me, provided by Kingsburg Orchards - growers of approximately 60% of the US ApplePear crop.)

You can stop with the Julia voice now, it's becoming annoying.   

I tested the non-browning claim by packing them in my lunch - claim confirmed!** Their texture is somewhere between a good, crisp Delicious apple and a ripe pear.  They are a bit pricey, in my opinion, at over $2 each, but they are also huge - a quarter of an ApplePear is plenty for one serving.  And they taste delicious dipped in caramel - but then, what doesn't?

Not sure why I thought you needed this info, but there it is - do with it as you please.

*Bartles and James commercials from the 90's.

**Mythbusters

A Puzzling Post

I've been having so much fun creating puzzles in the last few weeks, that I've decided to make it a regular feature. I'm shooting for one puzzle per week, but I'm leaving it vague so as not to constrain myself (please refer to my 50th birthday post in which I declare myself "over" schedules).  So, to kick things off, we're expounding on Sunday's Movie Quiz.  Now that you've identified the movies by picture, can you match each movie to it's quote?

1. Who would have thought a good little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness?
2. There's the whole world at your feet.  And who gets to see it but the birds, the stars and the chimney sweeps?
3. Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining.
4. Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
5. Maybe Christmas, perhaps...means a little bit more!
6. Negative, Ghost Rider, the pattern is full.
7. Anywhere you go, let me go too.  Christine, that's all I ask of you.
8. This is not a piece of land.  This is my home and I'm gonna be a father again and I don't want to bring my baby home to a condo on the beach!  I wanna drive down that street and I wanna pull into this driveway.
9. Stop her!  That's the girl whose voice you heard and loved tonight.  She's the real star of the picture.
10. He cannot stand still when the trumpet sounds.
11. That wasn't flying.  That was falling...with style.
12. Where does he get those wonderful toys? 
13. Well, I hate to disagree with you, but not only IS there such a person, but here I am to prove it.
14. Can I drive? - No - Then would you?
15. This is my house, I have to defend it.
16. Don't you worry.  If they could get a washing machine to fly, my Jimmy could land it.
17. Be sure to drink your Ovaltine.  Ovaltine?  A crummy commercial?  Son of a b*tch!
18. Is this a holdup? - It's a science experiment.
19. You've been given a great gift, George: A chance to see what the world would be like without you.
20. Snakes, Why'd it have to be snakes?
21. A boy's best friend is his mother.
22. You're skipping Christmas?  Isn't that against the law?
23. Ditto!
24. Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things you can't see.
25. Peel out.  I just love it when guys peel out.
26. You're a disgrace to the outfit.  You're soft!  You're sloppy!  You're unruly!  You're undisciplined!  And I never saw anything look so wonderful in my whole life.
27. Why would a man leave his apartment three times on a rainy night with a suitcase and come back three times?
28. Keep Christmas in your own way, and let me keep it in mine.
29. He wasn't even there.  That was important information, don't you think?
30. Ted Nugent called.  He wants his shirt back.
31. Jeez, what was that for? - It doesn't matter.  It's in the past.
32. The justice system works swiftly in the future, now that we've abolished all lawyers.

a. Secretariat
b. Toy Story 
c. The Wizard of Oz
d. Home Alone
e. Apollo 13
f. Mary Poppins
g. Lion King
h. Outlaw Josie Wales
i. How the Grinch Stole Christmas
j. Top Gun
k. Father of the Bride II
l. Singing in the Rain
m. Miracle on 34th Street.
n. Twister
o. Raiders of the Lost Ark
p. Batman
q. Rear Window
r. A Christmas Story
s. White Christmas
t. Back to the Future III
u. It's a Wonderful Life
v. Back to the Future II
w. Christmas with the Kranks
x. Phantom of the Opera
y. Ghost
z. Polar Express
aa. American Graffiti 
bb. A Christmas Carol
cc.  Animal House
dd. A Few Good Men
ee. Oceans's 11
ff.  Psycho